Silver Strands

Culinary Art 101

2008-10-15T12:14:00.000+08:00

I have been busy. Busy teaching myself the art of cooking. Since I was a kid, I have enjoyed being my mom's assistant everytime she cooks for us. I would always be excited when asked if I can cut the veggies, or peel garlic, or slice onions even if they make me cry.

Now, I can proudly say I have prepared meals which are not only delicious but also pleasing to the eyes. And I do this by browsing recipes from Jamie Oliver, Nigella Lawson, Gordon Ramsay, Rachael Ray, etc, then watching cooking shows, and giving the dishes my own 'twist'.

Although I miss my 'Cooking with Nora' recipe book which has a lot of yummy Filipino dishes, I'm sure it is in good hands and I am hoping that Vanessa is still cooking her delish adobo, shrimps in coconut milk, and fusion aglio olio.

I just wish my family and friends can taste my version of aubergine parmigiana, carbonara, grilled salmon and rainbow trout, sweet pepper aglio olio, bloomin' brilliant brownies (from Jamie's recipe), jam cookies, veggie stir fry with oyster sauce, and made-from-scratch-pancakes.

But my biased and only critique makes up for that by giving me 5 stars each meal review. Yay!

Surprise.

2008-10-03T13:58:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I received a nice surprise from Nick --- flowers in autumn colors! My smile was molar-to-molar (as my dentist, Doc Rica, aptly called it).

Not to be outshone, I also had a surprise treat for him --- quesadillas and home-made iced lemon tea.

Quits na ulit.

Now, I have to think about my happy-it's-Friday-surprise for later.

*Quesadillas Recipe
- Soft tortillas, cheddar cheese, salsa, spring onions
- Heat pan and layer tortilla, cheddar cheese, salsa, spring onions, and another tortilla. Once cheese has melted, turn over, remove from heat, and slice into triangles.

Lessons Learned

2008-07-23T22:07:00.000+08:00

This is a true story and should serve as a warning to everyone. I could not believe it happened to me.

Last June 28 (Saturday), I had lunch at Jollibee Lipa City with my aunt and fiance. We were seated in the middle of the food place and I placed my orange bag on the chair beside me (on my right). When we were nearly finished with our meal, a guy in his mid-30s, wearing a grey shirt and jeans came up to us and asked if the car parked in front was ours. Since our car was not blocking other cars and it was parked legally in front of the entrance, we were surprised why this guy was asking us that question. Our attention was focused on him and on the car and we were all looking left to check if there is anything wrong with the car. He didn't even wait for our answer and he left immediately and walked quickly outside. We were all still wondering what exactly happened when I noticed that my bag was nowhere to be found. I told everyone that my bag was missing and raised our concern to the manager so they can search the premises. They searched the toilets and trash bins but could not find my bag.

Unfortunately, my car key, our passports, 3 mobile phones, 2 digicams, 1 ipod, my wallet + other stuff were all in there. I couldn't even cry because I could not believe it was happening. I wanted them to call the police but the manager wanted to keep it hush-hush because he's saying it's a private company and they don't want bad publicity. But later I found out that this is a common incident in the area and they even found a black clutch bag in the toilet with important documents of a person from Las Pinas. This modus operandi was actually rampant in the area because some of the crew were telling me that we should just wait for a while and eventually our important stuff (e.g. passports) would turn up somewhere. My aunt kept on calling my mobile phone and sent text messages pleading the thieves to return our passports and car keys. I didn't even dare to think of the hassle and inconvenience we would have to go through to apply for new passports, visas, ATM cards, credit cards, IDs, license, etc.

Since the Jollibee management didn't want to call the police, my aunt went to the police station to report the incident while me and my fiance stood in front of the car (if in case someone would attempt to steal it). There was one Jollibee crew who was helpful enough to park his motorcycle in front of my car to hinder anyone from stealing it.

But during the time my bag was stolen, Jollibee's sole security guard was nowhere to be found and when he came back we questioned him. He said he had to check the delivery at the kitchen area. I was really disappointed with the way the management was handling the situation. They weren't much help at all. At this point, we were already suspicious with everyone and frustrated with the incident.

After two hours, someone from Caltex Star Tollway gas station called my mom saying they found our passports and car key in the trash bin. We quickly went there and found my wallet, car key, and our passports. I was relieved but at the same time REALLY, REALLY angry at the people who did this. We figured out they wanted money and valuable items but had a tiny bit of conscience to return important documents.

Still, it made me realize how some people are desperate enough to steal and commit crimes for the sake of a thousand pesos.

We reported this to the police and until now they are investigating the issue.

So lessons learned ---
1. Manila is not Singapore - you cannot leave your bags on the chair beside you (within your peripheral vision).
2. There are a lot of people desperate enough to commit crimes so be very careful when you are in public places.>
3. Don't put all your belongings in one bag especially when travelling.
4. Be vigilant.
5. Last but not the least, wag tatanga-tanga.

My first few attempts at oil painting

2008-06-09T23:19:00.005+08:00

Every Thursday, I have to carry a 24X30 stretched canvas to work so I can attend my class on time. I have to grab a quick dinner before 7. I have to get used to the smell of turpentine. I have to forget about clean hands and fingers. I have to focus yet at the same time squint so I can see the objects' shadows. I have to listen to oldies music while standing for 3 hours painting still life objects.
Exhausting. Tiring. Draining.
But every Thursday, I now go to bed with a smile on my face.

Airshow

2008-02-25T22:09:00.005+08:00

Some chopper photos for dad:

Black Knights (F-16C):

Busy-busy-han

2007-12-31T17:05:00.000+08:00

It’s the 31st of December and I’m home (and online). My home now is a two-bedroom flat and it has now become a cozy retreat for me.

If I was at home with my family…I would probably be out buying last-minute grocery items for the new year dinner…or I would be busy making the tortilla dough with my mom and sister (yummy tostados)…or who knows, I might also be online.

I have had a busy year…oftentimes too busy to write, sometimes too busy even to think (or feel). That might have bottled up all emotions (which I have previously shoved away) because the last few weeks of the year I have become too emotional with everything. (Which means the last bit of the year, I was not too busy...)

Since I am on my emotional mood, let me start by reminiscing about things I am most appreciative of:

All the time I’ve spent with my family…if I count the number of days, my ‘guesstimate’ would be less than 150 out of the 365 days of 2007.

The silly, serious, nonsense, deep, trivial, and fun conversations I’ve had with all my friends. Thanks for being always on call, online, just a drive away, a text away, or an email away.

Meeting new friends, colleagues, and random people from all walks of life who always provide opportunities for growth and self-fulfillment.

The encouraging, humbling, and valuable lessons I’ve learned by living independently. I have gained wisdom and strength, which I thought were impossible to achieve.

Taking a leap of faith. I am borrowing Soren Kierkegaard’s concept but not in the religious sense. I am talking about this absolute uncertainty and the belief that taking a leap requires you to have faith, trusting each other. And I know that even with life’s endless uncertainties, I want and will want to be with the one I love for the rest of my life.

Entries

2007-12-21T19:18:00.000+08:00

Singapore
#1#2

Philippines
#1

London

DIY

2007-12-21T18:47:00.000+08:00

I did my first two DIY projects last night (until the wee hours of the morning). And I had fun. It was also a good de-stresser for me, also something to keep me busy.
I bought from IKEA a DIY metal clothes rack and a side table. Then I had my first set of tools - screwdrivers, hammer, pliers, wrench (the works!). I followed instructions carefully but when I was almost done with the clothes rack, I found out that two rods have been installed incorrectly. So, I had to unscrew again, then re-screw the correct rods. It was tiring but when I saw the finished products, I smiled. It took almost 4 hours for me to finish both and probably if I had more muscles I would have completed it in less time.
I'm proud of myself and happy that my room now looks homey and cozy.
So if anyone needs to assemble tables, cabinets, etc. or are looking for DIY tips - please feel free to contact me. =)

Suitcase life

2007-11-13T23:13:00.000+08:00

It's been two months since I've been away from home, two months I've been shuttling my suitcase(s) back and forth. This reminded me of one of life's greatest lessons - the lesson of impermanence. Buddhist doctrines tell us that everything is constantly in flux and nothing is permanent. It has been a challenging, humbling, and exciting experience for me. It was also a nice practice for me because I realized that some things which I thought I cannot live without, I can actually manage to survive without them.

Now, I'm moving again and looking forward to living another chapter of my life.

Eye on Malaysia

2007-10-28T19:39:00.000+08:00

Of flowers and birds

2007-09-03T23:17:00.000+08:00

www.flickr.com

Dickinson

2007-08-20T11:11:00.000+08:00

Shomps told me she thinks that for me this poem is 'simple pero rock'...

If You Were Coming In The Fall
by Emily Dickinson

If you were coming in the fall,
I'd brush the summer by...
If certain, when this life was out,
That yours and mine should be,
I'd toss it yonder like a rind,
And taste eternity.

And I agree. Sayang nga lang walang Fall dito sa Pilipinas.

I needed some cheering up...

2007-08-06T23:01:00.000+08:00

and I learned that...
...I should never listen to sappy, sentimental, or melancholy songs...
...I should always drink moderately (a glass of wine should be fine)...
...I should always keep myself busy & look forward to the future...
...I should always talk to my mom because she's the best cheer-upper* in the world...

*cheer-upper: someone who cheers me up (there is no such word...I just made it up!)

ps. thanks to pol for keeping me sane...

Reminder from Paulo's The Witch of Portobello

2007-07-23T22:16:00.000+08:00

This time, Mr. Coelho reminded me that there really may be such a thing called love. And it's not a noun, but a verb.
Love simply is.

Petronas at night

2007-07-09T21:20:00.000+08:00

Petronas Twin Towers (Malaysia)

Good Samaritans

2007-06-28T23:53:00.000+08:00

I thought changing a flat tire was easy. Apparently, it takes special skills to change a tire. And I know I don't have those skills.
My sister's car (which I was using today) had a flat tire. I know I need to change it so at first I tried to get the jack. I twisted and turned the knob but it wouldn't expand. I got the tools...assessed them...but couldn't decipher which tool I should use.
I finally gave up staring at the tools and asked the help of the security guard in the parking lot. He asked another guy and they checked the tools if they would suffice. Another guy came and helped in the review. They finally found the one which would help in removing the flat tire. They were also able to expand the jack (it was too complicated for me!). They finally removed the exhausted tire, replaced it with the spare one, and tightened the knobs (or screws?! whatever you call those 4 circles). Amazingly, it just took them 10 minutes. I couldn't believe it! It took me 10 minutes to look at the jack and the tools and I got nowhere!
I now have high respect to people who know how to change tires. Especially to those good samaritans who helped me! And I know I wouldn't be able to do that in the near future because I lack the strength needed to tighten the screws. But at least I now know the purpose of each tool. That's good enough for me. Maybe with enough exercise and defined muscles, I can actually manage to change a tire. Or maybe there are good samaritans willing to help a damsel in distress...

Blooper

2007-06-06T00:35:00.000+08:00

I am used to committing funny blunders or bloopers and today was one of those days.
The day was going well. I have two training sessions and I was actually satisfied with how the attendees were participating in the discussions. Suddenly, I couldn't move my left foot and I realized that I was having a bad cramp. It was really painful but I still continued with the training and tried to hide what I felt. But I couldn't because I couldn't breathe and talk anymore. So I had to stop and advise everyone that I was having a foot cramp. This had to be the most unexpected ice-breaker I have accidentally created. We then took a break and after a few minutes, I was fine. When the Indonesian team came back to start the session again, they brought with them a painkiller ointment for me. It was really nice of them and we started the session again with my foot having a Ben-gay/liniment smell.
Lessons learned: (1) Indonesians are really kind. (2) Someone from the team has been experiencing some kind of muscle pain and I now have his/her ointment. Terima kasih to you!

Count the calories

2007-06-01T23:06:00.000+08:00

Surprise Birthday Cake for me and Surprise Despedida Cake for Carine...
Shared Birthday Cake for me, Gordon, Maan, and Philip...

Birthday Trivia

2007-05-31T21:27:00.000+08:00

Here's the customized surprise birthday cake from my Citi colleagues...
Birthday Breakfast: Pandesal with Spam + Arabica coffee
Birthday Plan: Do admin stuff, assess, read, think...
Birthday Outfit: Shirt + Shorts + Flipflops
Birthday Argh: My phone has network problems but it's intermittent. If I didn't reply to your text, sorry I may not have received it. Thanks for remembering!
Birthday Yay: Greetings + Flowers + Gifts
Birthday Music: Destiny by Zero 7 and Dreamchild Tunes
Birthday Books: Witch of Portobello and Man of My Dreams

The Unofficial Photo Contest

2007-05-19T19:50:00.000+08:00

Winning Photo:

Ta Prohm (Cambodia)

Other Entries:

The Bayon (Cambodia)

The Bayon (Cambodia) Ta Prohm (Cambodia)

My First Cooking Class

2007-03-11T18:42:00.000+08:00

I attended my first Thai Cooking Class this morning. Chef Sombat (Khun Bat for short) was like a mom who taught me the basic steps and important ingredients in thai food while asking me questions about my love life! I had a lot of fun deciphering the questions she's asking and explaining to her in basic English my answers.

Here's what we've prepared this morning:

1. Yam Sam Krob - spicy crispy squid, prawn, and fish maw salad
2. Kaeng Liang Chao Wang - spicy herb soup with vegetables and shrimps
3. Choo Chee Kung Nang - fried river prawns in red curry
4. Phad Khing Tao Hou - fried bean curd with shredded ginger
5. Bua-Loy Khai Whan - taro, pumpkin, and rice flour balls with egg in coconut milk
My favorites were the red curry prawns and rice flour balls (similar to our ginatan). I won't be able to practice much here but I will try my best when I'm home.

Some Pig

2007-03-11T18:18:00.000+08:00

It was my first time to watch a movie alone. When a Thai colleague asked me if I had plans for Saturday, I answered no and he gave me a free movie ticket to watch Charlotte's Web. He gave me two tickets but I just got one since all my teammates went home already. I was left on my own for this weekend.
Watching a movie by myself isn't as frightening as I've expected. It was actually similar to watching DVDs by yourself, except that the screen is really wide and there are strangers around you. I cried a lot of times (some scenes --- I was just teary-eyed) during the movie. I am not sure if being alone made the story even more 'cry-able' but I was really sad when Wilbur didn't win the blue ribbon, when Charlotte was dying, even at the end, when Charlotte's baby spiders were fleeing from the barn.
All in all, I'm glad the movie reminded me an important lesson about friendship and making a difference on someone else's life. Even gladder that I was able to watch a movie by myself...for free! =)

A month

2007-03-06T00:20:00.000+08:00

After a month of enjoying my semi-vegan lifestyle...I've become a carnivore again. I need protein! And I don't think I'm getting enough of it by eating pad thai, shrimp paste rice, and soft-shelled crab...

My Semi-Vegan Life

2007-01-28T00:01:00.000+08:00

Getting sick last Monday was the final catalyst.
Last Wednesday (24 Jan) was the start of my semi-vegan diet. It's now my fifth day and I'm really happy I made this health-related-decision. I have been thinking about this for more than a month now...ever since I read that Longevity article from National Geographic. People from different regions tend to live more than 100 years by following similar habits (e.g. no smoking, no meat, active lifestyle, close-family ties, and engagement in social activities).
Time to buy tofu, soy milk, peanuts, veggies, and fruits.

***Additional note - folks from Sardinia, Italy also included a glass of red wine with their vegetarian meals. =)

Debates and Drinking

2007-01-11T19:21:00.000+08:00

I have been in constant debates with myself over a lot of things (always while drinking a good cup of coffee, a glass of leftover red wine, generic green tea, or good old san miguel beer). Drinking while thinking always helps clear the senses and blocks out external noises from my mind.

Life always gives us a lot of opportunities. These may be given as beautifully wrapped presents or grimy pieces of trash. I know that during the past year, life has given me a lot presents (tangible ones and metaphorical ones) and at the same time, I was also given my equal share of mistakes which taught really valuable lessons.

One of which is not taking any crap from anybody. I believe in equality and no person is really greater than the other if you look at it biologically. Sooner or later, our ultimate end will be the same. Even though we share different beliefs, have different ideologies, religion, skin color, or levels of education, we are all human beings.

Passion is what defines us as a person. It's our reason for being. I have yet to identify mine but I know it's inherent in each person. All I know is that I'm taking one step at a time and each day is bringing me closer to that other greatest day of my life. And I applaud those people who have already defined theirs.

Love is overrated. I am a cynic, yes. And I don't give a damn. In reality, it's never really going to sound like there's music everywhere or your heart's about to burst.

Eating a heavy breakfast + only crackers for lunch + light dinner can really make you lose weight (significantly). Though I did not do this on purpose, I found out that this type of diet can work for me, if I want to lose weight in the future.

Risks are there for us to take. Taking risks (periodically) and not worrying about the 'what-ifs' can be good for our body and soul. Yes, it's healthy.

Reading is way better than watching TV.

I miss work...(slight pause)...NOT!

2006-12-22T01:56:00.000+08:00

I am officially on leave today. I love not waking up at 6:15 and not snoozing the alarm. I love slowly eating brunch and not quickly swallowing mouthfuls of coffee. I love watching TV and not caring about the time. I love wearing comfortable clothes (for today, it's black shirt + white shorts + flipflops) and not caring if my shoes and bag are coordinated. I love driving like I have all the time in the world and not zigzagging my way through the highway. I love staying up late and not counting the hours of sleep I will take later.
Tomorrow's another exciting day.

Bittersweet

2006-12-15T01:43:00.000+08:00

The conspiring universe is doing its job but I am finding it a bit bittersweet.

I have waited for almost three months for this. And now that I got it, I'm thinking, is this really what I want? In reality, even if I don't absolutely want it, I know I will still push through with it because it's the right thing to do.

Now I'm using my right brain to think.

From The Zahir by Paulo Coelho:
Until one morning, I'll wake up and find I'm thinking about something else, and then I'll know the worst is over. My heart might be bruised, but it will recover and become capable of seeing the beauty of life once more. It's happened before, it will happen again, I'm sure. When someone leaves, it's because someone else is about to arrive --- I'll find love again.

Habit

2006-11-30T22:00:00.000+08:00

I have been too judgemental a lot of times. Today was no exception.
Someone talked some sense into my fuzzy brain and reminded me that every single decision I make is part of a bigger, more defining objective. I have been befuddled by life's distractions and forgot about my long term goals. But he has strategically hidden wise advices beneath playful banters. Smart. Now, I will again start to think --- what makes me happy vs. what is right...

Seven Songs

2006-11-02T23:45:00.000+08:00

Tagged by Ilya.

List any seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.

1. Baby - Dave Matthews Band
2. Brighter Than Sunshine - Aqualung
3. At The Stars - Better Than Ezra
4. Wishing That - Jann Arden
5. Mumbai Theme Tune - A.R. Rabman
6. Fields of Gold - Eva Cassidy
7. Heartbeats - José Gonzalez

Tagging those who are currently reading this.

Home Sweet-est Home

2006-11-02T23:06:00.000+08:00

Yes, this post is really delayed since I've been home for 21 days. But everything has been a blur...a busy blur...a great blur. And this will continue for a long time.
Coming home and staying here can be likened to immunization shots which prevent or sometimes cure diseases. You get a vaccine once and you're set for life. That's the sweetest thing and nothing can replace that.
Homes are not perfect. The Simpsons' home is the opposite of perfection. Even the Brady Bunch home is far from being perfect. But the craziness of it all is the icing on the cake. I would not trade it for anything. On second thought, I can actually trade it for an even crazier one.

Localized

2006-09-30T14:53:00.000+08:00

It was my first time to attend an Indian Dinner Party. I had typical expectations of being served Indian food (veg or non-veg), being asked to drink Indian wine, hearing not only Hindi language but all sorts of state dialects (Tamil*, Marathi**, etc.), and being asked where is Philippines (pronounced as fee-lee-payns).

I was amazed at the similarities and differences.

I guess no matter where you are, the party will not start at the exact time stated on the invitation.
Girls would always like to dress up and it takes a long time for us to get ready for a party. (Especially since they had to drape the saree for me.)
Guys would always like to drink and smoke.
There's usually one office colleague who would bring his son or daughter in the celebration.

The similarities would stop there.

I was surprised when they started giving gifts to the hosts of the party. All of them stood up and clapped while the host opened the gift. Then after showing appreciation, the gift would then get passed for everyone to see.
When it's time to leave, you have to shake hands with everyone to ensure that you enjoyed the party.

PS.
I thought that it would be difficult to wear and carry a saree the whole night. Surprisingly, I felt comfortable wearing it (too comfortable that I'm looking forward to wearing a saree back home - hehehe).
I learned funny Marathi words (nalayek - useless; veda - mad/crazy; bawlat - stupid; dekna - handsome) and used them.
A woman wearing a bindi*** on the forehead signifies two things: (1) you're married; (2) you're highlighting your destiny because they say that your forehead is where your destiny lies.

________________
*Tamil - language spoken by people from the Tamil Nadu state (where Chenna is located).
**Marathi - language spoken by people from the Maharashthra state (where Mumbai is located).
***bindi - dot or jeweled accessory placed on the middle of the forehead

Two for One

2006-09-19T21:14:00.000+08:00

I met a French lawyer last Sunday. He generously offered a ride to the hotel. For some reason, they didn't have my flight details and did not send a car for me. Rather than waiting for them to send the car, I graciously accepted his offer.

I met a Nepalese chauffeur last Monday. I was so happy when I found out he's from Nepal. I have been wanting to visit that country ever since I met Tikka (that Nepalese bellhop in Sydney). The driver told stories about Kathmandu and the neighboring Bhutan and they made
me smile.

Thinking about these two nice stories made me forget about the irritating and frustrating day I had. =)

Letter from Unni

2006-09-02T12:48:00.000+08:00

Let me share you the letter I received from Unnikrishnan:

Respected Mam,

Since I was not sure that these clothes were laundry because there was 'No Laundry Slip' so I didn't take these for laundry.
If this is for laundry kindly place the laundry slip along with the clothes or at least switch on the laundry sign at the entrance.
Kindly cooperate with us to serve 'u' better.

Thanking You,

- Unnikrishnan [Housekeeping]

Here's my reply:
*NOT FOR LAUNDRY. Thanks.
___________

I actually felt like she was scolding me and reprimanding me for not following instructions. Oh well, I guess it's my fault. I wanted to separate my dirty clothes from my clean ones so I used the laundry bag and left it on the table. I did not really plan to have them washed yesterday so I didn't fill up the laundry form. I am now finding it funny because I am such an uncooperative guest. Hahaha...

My First Ticket

2006-08-21T14:21:00.000+08:00

My usual charm is not that effective anymore.

This traffic enforcer flagged me down last Saturday and asked for my license. I asked him what's my violation and he said I was obstructing traffic. Duh! I stopped because he asked me to stop. Though I reasoned endlessly with him, he still gave me a ticket. I was so pissed off. The weird thing was he gave me back my license after I threatened him. (If push comes to shove, threats should substitute charms.)

I think he gave me a bogus ticket. Oh well...I don't really care...as long as I have my license...everything should be fine.

People always turn up when they are expected

2006-08-09T02:10:00.000+08:00

This is the last sentence from Paulo Coelho's The Pilgrimage:

"And when I think about it, I guess it is true that people always arrive at the right moment at the place where someone awaits them."

***From the book version sold only in the India subcontinent. This translation might be different from other English versions.

www

2006-07-28T18:58:00.000+08:00

Wedding
The attack of the oranges during Tiffany and Manny's wedding celebration.
Wallclimbing
After months of not going to the gym and years of not playing badminton, my sleeping muscles got their needed dose of stretching last Wednesday.
Wisdom
1. The wedding reminded me to eat healthy and enjoy life's simple pleasures.
2. Honey and mint shampoo makes your hair squeaky-clean.
3. Wallclimbing made me realized that reaching the top of the wall is easier if you use your feet and legs to gain leverage.
4. Gatorade really quenches deep-down body thirst.

Beach-y

2006-07-19T17:26:00.000+08:00

It's still raining and I want to go to the beach...

For the meantime, I will be content with looking at some pics I took...

Bondi Beach (Sydney, Australia)

Wollongong Beach (New South Wales, Australia)

Pagudpud (Ilocos, Philippines)

Boracay (Aklan, Philippines)

Puerto Galera (Mindoro, Philippines)

Palolem Beach (Goa, India)

Vagator Beach (Goa, India)
Arossim Beach (Goa, India)

Fickle-mindedness

2006-07-18T20:48:00.000+08:00

This is another proof of my fickle-mindedness.

Feverish

2006-06-29T18:29:00.000+08:00

The Bollywood fever bit me. I just finished watching my second Hindi film (without subtitles again) and my head is pounding.

Here's the typical Indian movie experience....

Buy tickets, popcorn, nachos, drinks...or you can also have the food delivered to your seat (if you're too lazy to carry it).
There are usually no movie trailers...just advertisements and the frequent flashing of the movie or cinema license.
The India National Anthem is played while a picture of the flag is shown on the screen.Lights are turned off and the movie begins.
After about 20 minutes into the film, the music becomes upbeat and the actors start to perform lip-synched songs with choreographed dances. (The tunes are so lively, they made me bob my head..hehe..)
And then after an hour or so, the movie will stop --- literally.
The screen will freeze and the word INTERVAL is displayed.
Surprise! There's an intermission. Lights will be turned on for 5 minutes and you are free to go outside or to the restrooms.
The movie will then start and there will (again) be dances and songs and more dances and songs...
And then The End. (Some people actually clapped at the end of the film...they are really appreciative...)

The Indians should be given credit for their creativity and the breathtaking cinematography...amazing! The latest film I watched, Krrish, had nice effects and action scenes (sort of like kung fu style).

But maybe too much of incoherent foreign dialogues is not good for my brain cells. Discussing storyline theories with my Chinese boss afterwards did not help much either. And listening to more Hindi songs on the way back added to the constant pounding.

My headache is keeping me awake and I need my sleeping pills.

Firsts

2006-06-25T17:29:00.000+08:00

This week has been eventful. A lot of firsts...

* First time to ride a local taxi without AC ... and got into a collision accident with a small truck. (Nobody got hurt...whew!)

* First time I blocked a Skype user ... and did not feel guilty about it.

* First time to stay up late and 'really' watch football games ... then discuss it with the Indian guys the next day.

* First time to watch a Bollywood film in a local cinema without English subtitles ... liked it and understood around 70% of it.

Black and White

2006-06-21T12:44:00.000+08:00

I am back in Mumbai again.
But now I see everything in black and white.
Everyday, I will pass by these shanties going to the office. I, inside the air-conditioned vehicle with the driver asking me if the temperature of the AC is ok.
Them, outside their makeshift houses made of sack cloths and medium-sized twigs gathered from the garbage dumps across the Bandra-Kurla complex office buildings.

There seems to be no color as I look out the window. It's like I'm watching a silent film with kids running around naked while the mother is cooking something in an overused pot over an impromptu stove. There are also babies sleeping outside their three-feet hut with newspapers as blankets. If you try to look across the lot, you will see solitary figures heeding nature's call. If you again look at them walking around their tent-like houses, you will see their eyes. Their eyes are the ones doing the talking. And these eyes are telling me that there's nobody asking them if they have enough food for the day. Nobody cares if the meager food they have satisfies their empty stomach. No one gives a thought if they will survive another day.

I remembered a conversation with one of the locals and it seems that most of the people here share the same sentiments. They don't really care if floods wash away the slums. It's really no big deal to them if thousands die because of HIV. They just look at it as a means of reducing India's population.

Then I think, are we like them when we look at the railroad shanties in Manila? Are we apathetic to the conditions of the people living in the squatters' area?

If you have had your heart broken before, think about that feeling. That's exactly how I feel everytime I look at them and do nothing, hopeless and powerless...

But as with all things in life, I know there's hope (remember Hope, Despair and Memory by Elie Wiesel)...so here's hope for us:

__________

Philippine News, June 14, 2006:The poverty alleviation programs seem to be taking hold, with extreme poverty levels sliding from 33 percent of the population in the year 2000, to 30 percent today.Three percent may seem meager, but where the Philippines is concerned, this translates to some 1.6 million Filipinos who are now able to take care of their basic requirements, which they were not able to do six years ago.By definition, 30 percent of the population are unable to earn the equivalent of $0.68 a day, with which to buy 3.3 pounds of the Asian staple food of rice. The World Bank also says that 40 percent of Filipinos survive on $2 a day or less.
__________

It's amazing how being in another country awakens you to the plight of your own country and inspires you to do something.
I hope that when I go home, I will no longer view things in black and white.
(And I will never forget to count my blessings before I sleep).

Today

2006-05-31T23:32:00.000+08:00

Facts about today:

1. 26 years ago, my mom gave birth to me and almost got blind because of the anesthesia. Thankfully, the doctors were able to prevent it.
2. It is also my "bestest" friend's birthday - Happy Birthday to us Ma-an!
3. It is also my colleague Philip's birthday - Happy Birthday Phil!
4. It is also the birth date of Candida Maria de Jesus, the nun who founded the school where I spent 13 years of my education.
5. Today, I woke up with the sun's rays on my face and flowers near my bed.
6. I was able to drive again...but my license expires today and offline ang system ng LTO...so tomorrow, I need a driver!
7. I feel loved.

Facts about me:

1. I love wearing pajamas and cannot sleep without a blanket.
2. I have been almost-in-love or semi-in-love a lot of times but never been truly, madly, deeply in love with someone... always pigil...always mind over heart.
3. I cannot survive one day without drinking coffee...gourmet, instant, pantry...it doesn't matter as long as it tastes and smells like coffee.
4. I have no allergies to any kind of food.
5. I always sing while driving.
6. I am very fickle-minded (and this applies to everything...my mind can change in 1 millisecond and can change again in the next half-a-millisecond).
7. I can never play any type of sport. I always get tired easily...maybe because I'm anemic.
8. I love the beach but don't know how to swim. I love to travel but don't know how to ride a bicycle.
9. My fracture-dot-scars turn red whenever I drink alcohol.
10. I wear my watch on my right wrist.

Frustrated

2006-05-28T17:49:00.000+08:00

I accidentally deleted all the pictures...arggghhhh...
I thought I've learned my lesson after the hard disk crashed last year...
I have the solution but I have to wait...arggghhhh....

Last Goodbye

2006-05-26T10:26:00.000+08:00

I hate goodbyes. For one thing, I don't even know why there's something "good" in saying farewell to someone or something. I remembered that one colleague of mine was searching for the etymology of the word but could not find any. I decided to come up with my own explanation:

GOODBYE is a compound word having the words GOOD and BYE. Indirectly, these two words are opposites. Good is something that is remarkably wonderful while bye is an expression of farewell.

How can saying farewell be wonderful? Goodbyes have always been sad and poignant. They have been attributed with melancholic instrumental songs and unending stream of tears. Even more heart-wrenching are unexpected, forced, or unlikely goodbyes. These are the ones that either allow the person to say what they really mean to say or to avoid saying anything. I hate goodbyes because it's simply saying that it's the end. That's it. Deal with it.

But I will choose not to be content with that. I believe that there's really something good in goodbye. The French phrase for goodbye is au revoir - literally it means: until we meet again. That's the explanation that I am choosing. Farewell does not have to always mean that it's the end because there can always be a sequel, or a new chapter, or a new episode. When I said goodbye to you, what I really mean to say is that I know we will meet again.

Note: I looked for the word's origin and found this: Goodbye comes from "God be with ye". Interesting.

Eureka

2006-05-23T23:22:00.000+08:00

Good things usually come out of bad things. My flight was delayed for half an hour. I've read all the Time magazines I've brought and my laptop had no extra battery. With nothing to do, I sat and did a lot of thinking. Pondering about my life I finally made some guesses, some analyses, and finally a conclusion.

Eureka! I have finally decided to do what I really wanted to do. This is the only way that I will learn and grow. The decision is hard but I know in the end it will be all worth it. It's not an instantaneous thing so anything can happen. But for now, I am heading toward this goal.

Seasons & People

2006-05-11T23:19:00.000+08:00

Seasons...like people...come and go. Different seasons represent different events in our lives and there are people who are there only for a season. The only difference between a season and a person is that no matter what happens, that season will come. People, on the other hand, may be there one day but choose not to return again.

I guess the lesson for us is to cherish every moment with a person and keep those memories. And when that season comes again, you will be reminded to make the most out of it.

I am humming a song from the play RENT and I believe that one can really measure life by the moments that take our breath away. These moments are the extraordinary ones which are appreciated the most.

...in daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee...
...in inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife...

I accept that there are sad and happy moments. I am actually trying my best to be thankful for those sad and not-so-good events that have happened because they have paved the way for me to really appreciate and be more grateful for the happy moments. In the same manner, they have given me hope --- hope that laughter will be experienced again.

...the space between the tears we cry is the laughter that keeps us coming back for more... (Dave Matthews Band)

Wedding, fireworks, espresso

2006-05-02T14:34:00.000+08:00

Once in your life, you will find someone who's right for you right now. Significant factors prevent you from being at the right place all the time. But when you are both at the right place, the world conspires. The world creates a wedding in the street with people dancing to the beat of drums and trumpets. The world lights up fireworks to celebrate happy events and share this happiness to everyone. The world then serves you everything on a silver platter.

Everything is seemingly perfect until you wake up from that dream and realize that it's time to snap back to reality. It's now time to drink that single shot of espresso to jolt your senses.

You then realize that life is too complicated and you are now unsure if you want to add any more complexities.
You then think that life's mysteries never fail to amaze you because some things are just unfathomable.
You then feel that questioning nerve creeping up and trying to free itself to torment you.
You are then grateful for that chance and silently hope that the world will once again be good to both of you.

By the time you finished drinking the coffee (it's already cold but you still drank it), you have finally come to the conclusion that there is a reason for all of these. The important thing is never to forget these moments because one day you will finally understand the purpose.

Chicken or Egg

2006-04-27T16:24:00.000+08:00

My sister is the only person in the world:
whom I can have intelligent conversations with in 1 minute and not-so-intelligent discussions the next...while half-asleep...
who can wake up in the wee hours of the morning to open the door for me...and not be grumpy about it...
who can watch dvds with me while I make funny sounds humming the Universal Pictures theme song...(one of her happy thoughts..)
who can live with my laziness (turning off the lights/TV, getting water/cookies, throwing trash, etc.)
who can trust me with her journal...I will never read it ..(even if it's already opened to page #...hehehe)
who knows that when I seek validation, it just means that I need her support and I will still do what I want even if she does not agree...
who can scream at me and sing with me while driving...to keep me awake...
who can laugh at me and with me for my stupid mistakes...she also makes her own anyway...
who can play the next-song-game and book-game with me...analyses included...
who will accept me no matter what...

So in one of our intelligent/not-so-intelligent conversations, she asked me, "Ano nauna, chicken or egg?". She promised me that there's a psychological explanation for my answer. Without batting an eye, I answered, "Egg."

Then she explained that she and my mom both answered chicken and they are the ones who always think logically before making any decisions. And me?! What about me?

She said that I always tend to follow my heart. Hmmm....tsk..tsk...I don't know if that's a good idea...

I still haven't decided if it's good or bad...but one thought that came to me is this: I'm really so lucky to have a sister like her. Because I know that whether I make decisions with my mind, or with my heart, she'll always be there for me. (It's such a cliche but it's true..)

***Mental note: If ever I get to have two girls as my kids, I will let them share a room because it has done a lot of good to both of us. I know my sister wants to have a room of her own..but for now...she's stuck with me... hehehe... =)

How I survived 2 weeks in India without my teammates

2006-04-12T10:52:00.000+08:00

I've been alone in Mumbai. And it's a weird feeling. Weird because I usually travel with someone from my team. Though our trips sometimes overlap, I am usually on my own for 1 - 2 days...max...never this long.
I usually treasure moments of solitude...but not when I'm in an 'interesting' country, with 'interesting' people. And for more than 10 days.... parusa.

How did I survive?

1. Skyflakes: My mom is a genius. She bought a pack of crackers for me, just in case my hyperacidity attacks again. I cannot eat Indian food everyday...my stomach reacts in a negative way. A pack a day, keeps the doctor away.

2. iPod: No more Indian music please. Everyday, I make it a point to listen to OPM songs --- current faves are songs from Ultraelectromagnetic Jam album, MYMP, Christian Bautista, & Eraserheads. I love Tagalog....

3. Room Service/Grilled Ham & Cheese Sandwich: I'm a fan of room service orders and I love their thai green curry prawns + rice. My baon for lunch (almost) everyday is grilled ham & cheese sandwich. I make it a point to bring sandwich from the hotel so that I'll have an excuse not to join their 'Indian' lunch. It's not really that safe here to be adventurous when it comes to food...

4. Email/SMS/YM/Blog (and all other forms of communication): I am always happy whenever I receive non-work-related emails, short SMS, IMs, blog updates...thanks for keeping me sane. Actually I am not sure if you are really keeping me sane or making me crazier. I sometimes laugh (or smile) like a lunatic even when I'm alone...hehehe...

5. TV/Reading Materials: Current programs I'm watching (and getting addicted) are --- 5 Takes, Miami Ink, and Faking It. Thanks also to the ever-reliable Time magazines and DNA newspapers --- my constant companion during breakfasts.

So, just 2 days more to go. I still have 4 packs of Skyflakes...these will be enough.

Epictetus reflects on meetings

2006-04-09T15:02:00.000+08:00

*From Paulo Coelho's Warrior of the Light

Epictetus (55 AD - 135 AD) was born a slave and became one of the great philosophers of Rome. He was expelled from the city in 94 AD and it was while in exile that he came up with a way of teaching his followers. Here is an extract from his Art of Living.

"Two things may happen when we meet someone: either we become friends or we try to convince that person to accept our beliefs. The same thing happens when a hot coal meets another piece of coal: it either shares its fire with it or is overwhelmed by the other's size and is extinguished.

But, since, generally speaking, we feel insecure when we first meet someone, we are more likely to affect indifference, arrogance, or excessive humility. The result is that we cease being who we are, and matters move into a strange world that does not belong to us.

In order to avoid this happening, make your good feelings immediately apparent. Arrogance may only be a banal mask for cowardice, but it prevents important things from flourishing in your life."

My take: A coal's essence is to share its fire for warmth. If it does that and in the end turns into ashes, then it has lived its purpose.

No need to be sorry

2006-04-08T03:45:00.000+08:00

I have developed my daily routine in Mumbai:

7:15am - Wake up
8:00am - Eat breakfast
8:30am - Go to the office

The traffic route going to the office and the hotel car driver may be different everyday, but one thing remains constant --- the questions asked by the driver for the day:

1. Madam, where are you from?
2. Are you here for business? Which company?
3. How do you find Mumbai?
4. Are you married?

I know these are all harmless questions but sometimes it's too tiring to answer them everyday. And the funny thing is whenever I answer the 4th question, they will then answer me with a polite, "I'm sorry madam..."

So what does that mean?!

They are sorry that I am single? Why the hell will they be sorry that I'm not yet married?! Trust me, it's not a good way to start your day...

Then eventually I found out that here in India, it's common for women to get married at a young age. They even have arranged marriages and it's just normal for them to finish their education and get married. That seems to be true because there are not a lot of women in the workplace (specifically in Mumbai). I even conducted a training with 16 participants --- all of them guys. (Yes I'm the only woman in the room. Of course I was not intimidated..well maybe a bit...but pushed that thought away..)

What a highly patriarchal society! Maybe after 5 - 10 years it will change. No one knows what will happen.

The only thing that I know is that I'm very happy to be single and unmarried. Thank you very much for asking.

My Turn - from Ilya (Quattro - I've been tagged)

2006-04-07T05:41:00.000+08:00

four jobs i have had in my life:
1. intern (aka 'alila')
2. programmer
3. project implementation slave
4. N/A

four movies i would watch over and over:
1. Serendipity
2. How to lose a guy in 10 days
3. City of Angels
4. Under the Tuscan Sun

four places i have lived:
1. Our house
2. Burgundy Condo in front of Ateneo
3. Somerset, Sydney
4. The Ascott, Shanghai

four tv shows i love to watch:
1. CSI
2. CSI: NY
3. Travel Asia and Beyond
4. Will and Grace

four places i have been on vacation:
1. Batangas (my lolo's house)
2. Vancouver
3. San Francisco
4. Bangkok

four websites i visit daily:
1. www.cnn.com
2. silverstrands.blogspot.com
3. www.google.com
4. p2p portal ... hehe...

four of my favorite foods:
1. lasagna
2. pancakes
3. crabs
4. coffee

four places i would rather be right now:
1. manila
2. hawaii
3. boracay
4. venice

My Database

2006-04-03T08:08:00.000+08:00

I have my share of happy thoughts.
Whenever I feel bored, lonely or sad...I just browse through my happy thoughts database and replace negative feelings with positive ones.
Instant relief!
Right now, I am feeling sad because I'm leaving home again.
Time for my happy thought search.
Query results returned one happy thought.
I am now smiling because I know we will meet again.

In the meantime, I will be content with this.

It's all in the mind

2006-03-22T16:02:00.000+08:00

Thinking too much is one of my hobbies. It can be good at times especially if you need to logically find answers to your questions. Too much of anything, at the same time, can be also bad. I have been influenced by Descartes' philosophical statement: cogito ergo sum...I think, therefore I exist...

Thinking too much sometimes prevents me from doing what I think I should do...
Thinking too much makes me lose some opportunities that I could have held on to...
Thinking too much allows room for regret...

On the other hand...

Thinking too much helps me realize the why and the how of things...
Thinking too much gives me 'lessons learned'...
Thinking too much provides room for growth...

My advice: think moderately...

The Traveller by Maya Angelou

2006-03-22T15:51:00.000+08:00

Byways and bygone
And lone nights long
Sun rays and sea waves
And star and stone
Manless and friendless
No cave my home
This is my torture
My long nights, lone

Four-thirsty

2006-03-08T12:23:00.000+08:00

Thanks to my college buddies for the beer indulgence last Saturday. I enjoyed our most-awaited bonding session.

I think I need one (or maybe three) right now!!! I am so pissed off by that someone who should not be named... Add to that the vivid dream I had last Friday... so sad...

Eight-thirsty anyone?!

Japanese Cooking 101

2006-03-01T17:21:00.000+08:00

Issues:
1. I missed my mom's birthday last Wednesday. I missed the surprise my siblings had prepared for my mom.
2. I got tired of eating Indian cuisine. My stomach already had enough of paneers, naans, and chapatis.

Resolution:
To kill two birds with one stone, I decided to make homemade california maki for my mom's birthday party last Saturday. This way, I can make up for missing my mom's birthday and allow my taste buds to experience something oriental.

Ingredients:
Japanese rice, Japanese vinegar (substitute: rice wine + vinegar & sugar), seaweed wrapper or nori, kani (crab sticks), cucumber, ripe mango, wooden mat

Instructions:
Wake up early and buy all the ingredients from the grocery store (i.e. Shopwise).
But if you already have all the above ingredients from your pantry/ref, then you're probably living in Japan so you can skip reading this blog entry, domo arigato gozaimasu!
You can probably make it with your eyes closed... =)
Wash your hands and make sure they are very clean.
Cook the Japanese rice as you would cook the normal rice (for me -- via the rice cooker)...hehe..
Slice vertically the cucumber, ripe mango, and kani (if it's too thick) while waiting for the rice to be cooked.
Pour some Japanese vinegar over the cooked rice and mix well.
Lay the nori on the wooden mat.
Spread some rice on top of the nori.
Layer the cucumber, kani, and mango strips.
Roll one end of the nori to close and cover the cucumber, kani, and mango.
Roll until you reach the end of the wrapper.
Slice horizontally into bite-size pieces.
Serve with Kikkoman soy sauce and wasabi paste.

I had fun making them, enjoyed eating them, and got superb compliments. Hai, oishi desu.Hmmm...that sushi chef really inspired me. Japanese pepper, anyone?!

_____________
Thanks to my sister for teaching me how to make maki.

Sugar Frosted Flakes and Sarees

2006-02-23T11:30:00.000+08:00

Choices...choices... Last week, I chose sugar frosted flakes over regular corn flakes. I know that corn flakes without sugar is the healthier option. But I decided against that and opted for the not-so-good-for-my-health bowl. Maybe life's monotony prompted me to make that decision. Yummy, sweet, and sinful. That would probably be the subliminal message conveyed on the shirt which says: Sugar Frosted Flake. I bought the shirt, finished the bowl, and continued with my life. Sugar frosted flakes added a dash of surprise to life's sameness and I think I needed that.

We'll never know but one day I might again be too tired of my so-called routine life. Who knows, maybe one day, I might probably wear a saree* instead of my usual jeans-shirt-sneakers attire.

_______________
*saree - from the Sanskrit word 'sati', which means strip of cloth; a dress worn primarily by Hindu women; consists of several yards of light material that is draped around the body.

NOTE: The image above shows me wearing the shirt and asking for a demo on how to wear the saree.

Goodbye My Lover

2006-02-18T17:22:00.000+08:00

Three months ago, I told myself I am not in love. Now, I have come to know you well and I have been addicted to you. I thought I will never say this to myself, but I think I have fallen in love with the city.

I missed Singapore's utopian facade, freshly-cut grass, diverse people, and almost-perfect environment. I took everything for granted and realized the truth in Janet Jackson's/Joni Mitchell's Got 'Till It's Gone lyrics --- don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you've got 'till it's gone.

I have said goodbye but I will still hold on to the memories which have touched my heart and my soul. As James Blunt has aptly defined it --- goodbye my lover.

First Day in Bombay*

2006-02-17T18:17:00.000+08:00

Some unforgettable lines I have heard today:

Mumbaikar 1: I was looking at you while you were crossing the street and you looked so scared...
Mumbaikar 2: I don't get what you mean.
Non-Mumbaikar 1: Pilipino kayo?
Mumbaikar 3: Acha**
Mumbaikar 4: Haah***...Haah...

It was quite an experience for me, an enriching one I may say. It's a different world here and I need to master the art of tenacity.

_______________
*Bombay - from the Portuguese word Bom Baia which means Good Bay; an old name for the city of Mumbai, a city in western India just off the coast of the Arabian Sea; India's 2nd largest city (after Calcutta).
**Acha - Hindi word for OK.
***Haah - Hindi word for Yes. (So pag sinabi ko na hahaha...yesyesyes pala yun dito...)

Collide's Sequel

2006-02-14T17:14:00.000+08:00

A Waltz for a Night from the movie Before Sunrise.

***Got this from Ash.

Les Misérables

2006-02-14T17:03:00.000+08:00

Even though you do a lot of good to others, you will still meet some people who try to destroy your day.

These are the ones who lead miserable lives and they cannot help but make the lives of happy people miserable. Hah!

It's a good thing someone gave me a lollipop. I'm eating it now and the sweetness melts away my frustration.

No matter how kind you are, no matter how many smiles you have given to others, something or someone may come and wash away that sunshine. But the good thing is there will always be a new day and it may even be a very sunny day.

Positive thinking is the key.

The Conversion

2006-02-14T16:37:00.000+08:00

I have been converted. I have never really listened to Hed Kandi stuff before (well maybe except 2 or 3 songs). I never knew House music can have gospel songs. Last Friday, I watched Peyton live in the Ministry of Sound (SG) and I loved his songs. He sang I'll Rise, A Higher Place and one song (which I don't know the title) with some 'this little light of mine, i'm gonna let it shine..' lyrics. Awesome!

My curiosity led me to search for Hed Kandi stuff and eventually Peyton-related info. I found out he was one of the members of the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy (UK version), an artist, and a Preacher's son. I found out that I'll Rise was derived from Maya Angelou's poem Still I Rise.

Nice tunes + amazing lyrics = my sounds. Now I can't wait to get hold of his cds and mp3s.

Success or Greatness

2006-02-09T17:15:00.000+08:00

Watching the film Elizabethtown made me think of the difference between success and greatness. If you read newspapers, watch TV, or just observe the world, you will realize that the world is more concerned with success than greatness. Schools reward the students who get the correct answers while companies measure an employee's performance if the actual result is equal to or greater than the expected outcome.

If you don't succeed, you might as well vanish into thin air because in the eyes of everyone --- you have failed.

What these people don't realize is that even though you failed, there is a thing called greatness which can never be measured. This intangible quality is the one that is almost always forgotten. We often forget to take note of a person's generosity, martyrdom, positivism, and kindness. If one possesses these characters, he/she can be called great because one does more than what is expected of him/her.

Should this really be a choice for us? Can we be successful and great at the same time?

As promised

2006-02-03T14:08:00.000+08:00

As promised, here is one of the pictures taken while driving along Star Tollway.
The challenge: Taking a picture while inside a car cruising at the speed of 100kmh.
The result: Blurred pic capturing the sunset, coconut trees, and highway.
The caveat: Don't do this while driving. Ask someone to do it for you.

L-M-B

2006-02-01T03:51:00.000+08:00

It felt good to dive in and take a risk.
It felt good to stay committed to one of my resolutions.

Now the time has come to set myself free.
Time to move on.

Panic Mode

2006-01-21T01:41:00.000+08:00

I don't know what's happening to me these past few days.

I missed my 9:40am flight back to Manila today.
I learned never to assume because as my colleagues would say...ASSUME is making a** out of u and me.And yes, I assumed my flight was at 1pm...because that's my usual flight...but no...when I checked out of the hotel...I looked at my ticket...and saw that my flight was at 9:40am!!! What the f?!

Lesson learned...always check the ticket. I think that's one of my bad habits...I never look at my ticket thoroughly. This is actually the second time I missed a flight. Last year, my friends and I missed our domestic flight back to Manila. I hated the agony of waiting. I hated that panic mode I was in.

Luckily, someone out there saved me. I was able to get a flight.

No more next time please.

Finally

2006-01-11T15:31:00.000+08:00

Finally I was able to sleep soundly last night and wake up late this morning. (Thank God today is a holiday for them!)
Finally I was able to buy the dark brown wedge sandals I like. (Found a shop with my size!)Finally I was able to listen to James Blunt's You're Beautiful the whole day. (Singapore's theme song...I think!)
Finally I was able to go to the gym for the 2nd time this week. (Bukas ulit!)
Finally my coughing spasms were lessened. (Pesteng ubo be gone!)

I am thankful for life's simple joys.
I just wish I can go home sooner.
I am counting the days...

Insomniac

2006-01-04T16:47:00.000+08:00

I don't think I am an insomniac. I sometimes can't sleep at night because of too much caffeine in my bloodstream. Tonight (rather today), I can't sleep because of my cough (pesteng ubo). This has been dragging most of my energies since Jan 1. I will do anything to get rid of this. Save me!

For the meantime, let me post this SMS from my cousin - Haidee:

Everything that God allows to come our way is with a purpose. He uses even the greatest error and the deepest hurt to mold us into a person of worth and value.

How true...thanks for those words of wisdom.

This pesteng ubo has a purpose. Ok please let me sleep now.

Resolutions...resolutions

2006-01-04T03:57:00.000+08:00

As always, I like to start the year right by jotting down my new year's resolutions. Others may think it's too cliche but this really works for me. I don't want to list down my last year's goals but I am proud to say that almost all have been accomplished! (Applause! Applause!) Yeah, yeah except for that one...that one big goal. My closest friends know what I'm talking about so no need to publish that. =P

So a few of my goals for this year are the following:

1. Exercise and keep myself healthy - no more fractures or dizzy spells please.
2. Learn and practice how to cook like mom.
3. De-clutter my room (shared with my sister) on a quarterly basis
4. Think positive - this will always be included in my yearly list. Yes it's one of my mantras.
5. Take risks - am I ready for this? Remember philo - lundagin mo beybe!
6. Secret resolution # 1 - to be revealed on Dec 31, 2006.
7. Secret resolution # 2 - to be revealed if I have accomplished it.
8. Help the ones who need help.
9. Thank Him for the blessings and share these blessings to others.
10. (I leave this blank as I am sure I will think of something new to add within the year. This will be null for now.)

Looking forward to the year of my Peachy.

Perfect Christmas Moment

2005-12-27T13:47:00.000+08:00

I had my perfect Christmas moment yesterday.

I have always loved driving. It always gives me a chance to think, clear my head, sing with off-key tunes, and relax. I was driving along the Star Tollway on the way to Batangas yesterday, Christmas day, and it was perfect. Cruising along a seemingly endless highway with a vast expanse of coconut trees on my right made me think that life is really beautiful. La Vita Bella. It seemed that I was driving on a highway leading to the clouds. If you just sit back and relax, you will see a straight path with clouds at the end.
I contemplated on everything --- life, year 2005, my family, friends, colleagues, goals, expectations, good things, bad things, happy moments, etc.

Then I realized that even though not everything happened the way I wanted it to be, it was just perfect because it was the way it should be. I'd like to think that I'm still driving along the path that would lead me to the clouds. I don't know what the future will bring me but I know that it will be according to that divine plan.

Singapore Shots

2005-12-16T13:38:00.000+08:00

No...not tequila shots or singapore slings...
Check out some pics I took:

Singapore

East Meets West

2005-12-07T16:48:00.000+08:00

I seldom watch NBA but I suddenly found myself drawn to one player --- Yao Ming. Even I, myself, am having a hard time explaining why I admire him and why I find him "so handsome". Yes I know most of my friends don't often approve of my so called "taste" in guys. I have a weird way of defining someone who is attractive for me. (That's why they call it opinion --- it's subjective!) I remembered one time during college, I had a crush on someone who was a batch higher than me. He was a senior, I was still a junior. I excitedly told my friends that I found the most handsome guy in the whole world. They looked at him and they said, "Huh?!" Okay, okay, now I admit, he is really not the most handsome guy (although he is still handsome the last time I saw him --- that was when I was taking up MBA, he was taking law), but hey, he is smart!

Back to Yao Ming...

I need to justify why I like this Chinese sports star. Here are the top 5 reasons why I like him:

1. I like his name --- Ming means bright, derived from the Chinese character that unifies the sun and the moon. What could be better than unifying the sun and the moon?! I am now thinking of calling my next pet "Ming" or "Ming-Ming"... =P

2. He still lives with his family. He is a typical Asian guy who is sometimes irritated by how a mom is overprotective but deep inside, is overflowing with love for her. Even though initially he didn't want to play basketball when he was young, he still endured the long hours of training because of his love for his parents. Amazing guy...

3. We are of the same age. (Pasok siya sa age range ko.)

4. He loves McDonald's and home-cooked Chinese meals. I like his east-meets-west taste in food. Good! His taste buds are not limited to xiao long bao and green tea!

5. Oh and did I mention he's already a multi-millionaire at the age of 25?! And the good thing about this is that he doesn't act like one. So humble and simple!

Too bad he already has a girlfriend...and I don't look Chinesey-enough for him....Maybe if I change my name to Ju Li...there's still hope.

Mars and Venus

2005-11-29T14:48:00.000+08:00

Here's the story - one of my guy-friend started an email chain that went like this:

******

From: Guy1
Sent: Thursday, November XX, 200X X:XX PM
To: Guy2; Guy3; patricia; Guy4
Subject: amazing discovery...

Coaches...now I know where they hide the cuties of SG (aside from Sing Air of course)...sa ! =)

******

So what's wrong with this email?! It seems like a pretty normal email, right. But for all you geniuses out there...you might have the same observations as I did.

1. Coach - term used in a basketball game pertaining to the person who manages the team and the plays. Heck...I don't even know all the teams in NBA & PBA and I seldom watch the games. Do I play basketball?! Of course not...it's too tiring and sweaty for me. I could never understand why all the guys are fighting for 1 ball...haha! They can just get their own balls and shoot hoops. I know..I know...that's the game! My mind cannot fathom the way how the players "body-bump" (in all their sweaty-glory) each other whenever they make a nice pass or nice shot. Imagine that your pores are all open and another person's sweat will become mixed with your sweat....tsk..tsk...very un-hygienic.

2. Distribution List - I'm the only girl in the DL. Do I care if they found out where the cute girls are? This is not an amazing discovery for me as it is for them. Trust me, an example of an amazing discovery for me is finding out that a South Korean scientist had successfully cloned a dog (and named him Snuppy) or that the plant 'star anise' is the main ingredient for the bird flu shot Tamiflu. Knowing where cute SG girls hide is the least of my concerns.

3. Buddy - I am not sure if this is a positive or a negative factor but these guys are treating me as their 'buddy'. That's good in a sense that they are giving me their own perspective and sharing their concerns. Yes it is actually helping me in understanding men because as we all know --- Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. There's always this mystery in each gender that makes us long for the other and at the same time despise the other. Being surrounded by them gives me a firsthand knowledge what is going on in their minds. At the same time, it gives me this realization that men will be men --- polygamous by nature. I can actually hear them say, "No, we're just appreciating the beauty that is surrounding us..." Don't get me wrong, I am not attracted to anyone of them and they are all married and committed. But sometimes, I think I'm becoming more and more exposed to the way how guys are really 'players'. Ok, ok that's being overboard. These guys are my friends and I know deep in their heart, they are really committed to their significant other. Sometimes, though, they can't help but "appreciate" the beauty of nature.

I therefore conclude that men are really from Mars. Although they frequently travel to Venus, once they have found their "Venutian" partner, they can actually change their "Martian" ways.

***Disclaimer: Some facts have been changed to protect the identity of the characters.

Pinay Fervor

2005-11-27T02:25:00.000+08:00

When I first traveled outside the country, I asked my mom this question: "If you saw me for the first time, from which country do you think I'm from based on my features?" After thinking for a while my mom told me I look like I'm from Malaysia. (Grrr...I don't look like a Pinay!)

That answer was further proven when strangers I met during my travels asked me if I'm from Malaysia, Singapore, or Indonesia. An Indian chef even thought I was from India. So how come they didn't think I was a Filipina? That question lingered in my mind until an American guy sitting in front of me during breakfast asked if I was from the Philippines. I was so surprised and asked him how did he know. He said he saw me bless my food before eating and since I looked like an Asian, he concluded that I might be from the Philippines because it's the only country in Asia with the highest population of Catholics. Good analysis, I thought.

So that answered my question. People judge us initially by our appearance, and further by our actions. If I act like a Pinay, they would see me as a Pinay. So I came up with some distinguishing characteristics of a Filipina:

1. Expressive - According to my Chinese colleagues, the thing that they noticed among us Filipinas is that our face can have a lot of expressions. When we feel happy we smile a lot and the smile reaches our eyes --- making it all the more sincere. When we feel bad, the frown can be seen on our face and can even be observed by the slouch of our shoulders. We are not afraid to express how we feel and even if we try to hide them, our feelings are still displayed through our actions.

2. Strong - We can survive in any place, given any task. If you go around the world, you will see that most nurses, caregivers, etc. are mostly Filipinas. This is because these professions are the most physically and emotionally draining. And I can say with pride that most Filipinas can take on that responsibility with dignity.

3. Religious - Because of the Spanish colonization, most of us grew up in a Catholic family. We have been taught to pray the rosary, pray before eating, pray before going to bed, go to mass every Sunday, etc. Catholic teachings have been engraved in our ancestors, our lolas, our moms, our titas --- to the point of sometimes being 'fanatics', thus the term Catholic fanaticism. I am in no way complaining because this is one of the traits that distinguish us from our Asian neighbors.

The list is short and simple --- like a Pinay. (Ack...that really is a cliche...erase..erase). Seriously speaking, after living a so-called "Shanghainese life", I really missed everything Filipino. I have to confess that I listened to Tagalog songs during my trip back to Manila. I missed those semi-'kundiman' heart-wrenching songs that always make you think about unrequited love or 'kilig' moments. (This further proves point # 1 --- we really can't help but express our feelings --- sometimes through music.)

So if someone again asks me if I'm from Malaysia, Singapore, or Indonesia, I'll just answer him/her: "Hindi, Pinay ako." =P

Memoirs of Shanghai

2005-11-10T15:37:00.000+08:00

It's only been 6 days since I left Shanghai and I'm already feeling the after-effects. Last Friday, I was so excited to go home but I think now...I can say I am officially missing Shanghai.
Here are some of my cherished moments in Shanghai:

1. Looking for Starbucks - Because of my caffeine-addiction & limited Mandarin, I ended up demonstrating that I want to buy "hot coffee" because they cannot understand my English question - "Where is Starbucks?"

2. DVD nights - We have our very own DVD "suki" in Shanghai! And the best thing is that the DVD guy knows the specific movie genre we like. He even suggested to me the movie "The Sisterhood of Traveling Pants"! And who can ever forget the questions we always ask the DVD guy --- "Is there Eng-won (English) translation?" or "Is this clear -- DVD9?"

3. Ascott Breakfast - Free breakfast...free music --- all-time hits of Britney Spears, Michael Learns to Rock, & Backstreet Boys. This got us to think -- what would be the perfect music you want to listen to when you eat breakfast?!

4. Xiao Long Bao - the most famous Shanghainese delicacy which should be pronounced according to Cathy's tone --- xiao (normal tone) long (low tone) bao (high tone).

5. Take Me To Your Heart - the infamous Michael Learns To Rock single that is heard all over Shanghai --- supermarkets, shopping malls, ringback tunes, videokes, mp3s, F1, etc.

6. Weekend Brunches - weekends will never be complete without our satisfying brunches --- Element Fresh, Westin, Azul, Crystal Jade, M on the Bund, New Heights, Mesa, etc.

7. The so-called ABC (American-born-Chinese) - one of life's little surprises.

8. Photo shoots with V (Victory) sign - Have you ever wondered why almost every person in China puts up the V sign whenever they have their pictures taken?! According to them, the V sign is for victory. My colleague taught these Shanghainese that they can also do it the Filipino-way using W (for wagi). Check these out...

9. Welcome to take my taxi - Thanks to Ann for teaching me the Mandarin terms for left turn (zou chwan), right turn (you chwan), straight (ichi zou), receipt (fa piao), and of course thank you (xie xie).

10. Last but not the least....How could I ever forget my fractured-wrist-experience in Shanghai?! This was the highlight of my China stay! I will forever remember this because of the 6 pin scars or should I say dots (because they look like mosquito bites which will never go away) on my left wrist. I am thinking of having a tattoo to cover the scars...

I don't think I can say tai tien (good bye) to Shanghai...

Bread and Jam

2005-11-02T12:53:00.000+08:00

Howie Day's Collide

Typical

2005-10-31T13:39:00.000+08:00

He sent a message to me.
He asked me how I was.
He explained some things to me.
He answered some questions on my mind.
He called me up.
He said something embarrassing.
He said something ironic.
He said I was sober.

I was waiting for that message.
I was ecstatic but I didn't show it.
I was relieved.
I was happy.
I was waiting for that call.
I didn't know what to say.
I felt afraid.
I want to see him again.

Prohibiting the prohibited

2005-10-27T21:54:00.000+08:00

*** This is an excerpt from Warrior of the Light Messages from Paulo Coehlo.

Right after the talk in The Hague in Holland, a group of my readers came up to me. They wanted me to visit the city where they live, claiming that there was a unique experience in Europe going on there.

“Unique experiences” are like water off a duck’s back to me, but at the same time I love talking to strangers. We set an appointment for the following morning, since my flight to Paris would only leave in the late afternoon.

The readers – two girls and four boys – promised to take me to the airport as soon as I had seen something “unique in Europe” and escorted me to a neighborhood in the city of Drachten. We got out the car, they had a beer, I drank coffee. They looked at me in surprise, but I could not understand what was going on. After some time, one of them asked: “Don’t you notice anything different?” A pretty little town, people walking down the street, an autumn day that still seemed like summer. Aside from that, just the same as all the other towns that I have known all over the world. They paid the bill, we crossed the street to go to another bar, they asked me to look again – and I still found Drachten very nice, and very like the rest of Europe.

“You disappoint me,” said one of the girls. “I thought you believed in signs.” “Of course I do.” “And have you seen any here?” “No.” “Well, that’s just it! Drachten is a town without signs!” Her boyfriend added: “Traffic signs!”

All of a sudden I realized that they were absolutely right: the famous “Stop” sign was nowhere to be seen, nor were the pedestrian crossings and “give way” notices. There was not a single one of those contraptions we call traffic signals with their red, yellow and green lights! And to my surprise, there was not even a division between the sidewalk and the street. The movement was far from small: trucks, cars, bicycles (omnipresent in Holland), pedestrians, everything seemed perfectly organized in the middle of a place where there was nothing to put order into the traffic. At no moment did I hear a curse-word or hear the sudden screech of brakes or deafening horns honking away.

On the way to the airport, they told me a little about the experience, which I have to agree is truly unique. The idea came from an engineer called Hans Mondermann. He was working for the Dutch government in the 70s when he began to think that the only way to reduce the growing number of traffic accidents was to make the drivers fully responsible for what they did.

The only measure he took was to diminish the width of the roads that passed through villages by using red bricks instead of asphalt, remove the central line that separates the two flows of traffic, destroy the curbs, and fill the verges with fountains and relaxing landscapes – so that the people stuck in traffic jams could be distracted while they waited. Then came the radical decision to take down all the traffic lights and put an end to the speed limit.

When they first entered the town, the 6,000 motorists who passed by every day were astonished: where can I turn? Who has the right of way? And so they began to pay twice as much attention to what was going on around them. Two weeks later, the average speed was under 30 km/h in places like Drachten.

Monderman proclaimed loud and clear: “If a pedestrian is about to cross the street, of course the cars will have to stop: our grandparents taught us the rules of courtesy.” So far this has been a success. I reached the airport thinking that Monderman did not just implement a traffic experience, he did something much deeper than that.

After all, as he himself says: “If you treat people like idiots, they will behave according to the rules, and nothing else. But if you give them responsibility, they will know how to use it.”

*** So will I still believe in signs?! Indirectly, this message is telling me not to believe in signs (defined in my own terms). More often than not, my decisions are affected by these so-called signs. Little by little, I'm realizing that I have the responsibility to act based on what I really want to do. Goodbye signs!

Collide by Howie Day

2005-10-26T11:50:00.000+08:00

The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find you and I collide...

I's and C's

2005-09-20T11:22:00.000+08:00

Karl: Life is full of interruptions and complications.

Patricia: It wouldn't be called life if there are no interruptions and complications.

These are a few of my 'recent' favorite things/places

2005-09-12T15:26:00.000+08:00

1. Starbucks latte/mocha or Sustagen chocolate --- keeps me awake.
2. Xujiahui, St. Ignatius Cathedral --- Chinese mass with English Gospel translation.
Xujiahui (pronounced as shoe-jah-way) is the site of Shanghai's oldest Western settlement --- a Jesuit centre started by a Chinese Catholic, Paul Xu, in the early 17th century. Xu was a high-ranking Ming official and a committed scholar, who had converted to Catholicism. He donated some of his land in Xujiahui (meaning 'gathering place of the Xu family') to the Church and invited Jesuit missionaries to take up residence.

3. Jinmao Tower --- good food + good view = perfect.
It has 88 stories, claiming the title of the world's highest hotel.

4. Lujiazui Park --- lake + flowers + grass = 1 scenic office route.
**Office - first building from the left.

5. Qi Pu Lu --- shoes, shoes, shoes.

6. MB Taxi --- who wouldn't want to ride in a Mercedes Benz taxi?!
**Fare is the same with ordinary taxis.

7. Xintiandi --- similar to Eastwood/Alabang Town Center.
Xintiandi (pronounced as shin-tien-dee) translates as 'New Heaven and Earth'. It's a celebration of modern Shanghai's ability to fuse old and new, East and West. Its 28 buildings, grouped into North and South blocks, are all examples of renovated or wholly reconstructed shikumen, or 'stone-grated' lane houses, a fusion of 19th century English terrace housing with south-of-the-Yangtze traditional Chinese residences.

Fave din-dins: Din Tai Fung, Crystal Jade, Haagen Dazs, Latina, Xin Jishi

8. Haagen Dazs --- yummy Belgian chocolate.

9. The Ascott --- very helpful and friendly staff.

10. TIME magazine --- 3 more editions to read...

11. Skyflakes --- sarap!

12. 'Best I'll Ever Be' by Sister Hazel (i miss you...i miss being overwhelmed by you...)

Commonly used English phrases in Shanghai

2005-09-12T15:20:00.000+08:00

Here are some of the famous English phrases I hear everyday:

1. Welcome to take my taxi -- the recorded welcome greeting whenever you ride a taxi.
2. Please wait a moment -- Whenever you have a question and they cannot give the answer immediately, they will tell you to 'please wait a moment'.
3. Not at all -- Whenever you say thank you in English, they will answer 'not at all', meaning it's no problem for them or you are welcome.
4. Just so-so -- If it's not spectacular, not special, not the best, they will answer that it's just so-so.

Judging from the above phrases, one can tell that:
1. I always ride a taxi.
2. I always ask questions.
3. I always say, 'thank you'.
4. I always ask them, 'how are things?'.

Freedom Day

2005-09-02T02:02:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow is my freedom day. Freedom from being a one-handed individual. My left wrist was fractured last July 15 (Friday) and from then, I felt inhibited and restrained.

Let's go back to that fateful night and check if I can remember everything (no more traces of retrograde amnesia*!)...

Yes, I went back to Ascott after having dinner with Cathy, her Aunt, her cousin Mike, and Ann at Xin Jishi**. To prepare for tomorrow's out-of-town Hangzhou trip, I decided to turn in early and went to the bathroom to change. The next thing I knew, I woke up with a very sore hand and, and --- couldn't remember anything that happened before I woke up. Sounds silly, diba?! But it's TRUE!!! I kept on walking and walking inside the room, going to the living room, kitchen, etc. but I couldn't remember where I am! I decided to call someone --- anyone just to help me recall where I am. Everything seemed jumbled somewhere in the deepest recesses of my brains. I just couldn't get my mind to figure out what is happening to me.

I used my PH mobile and called Ann. (Good thing that a part of my brain was still sane and told me not to call my mom, so I called Ann's CN mobile instead.) Instantly, Ann knew something was wrong because I called her using my PH instead of my CN number. I kept on telling her that I don't know where I am. So she went to my room and saw my swollen hand and immediately called Cathy. They stayed calm so I could stay calm but in their heart, they knew that they have to take me to the hospital.

Though the hospital was just a few blocks away, one of the hotel security head accompanied us and helped us with everything. As the nurses couldn't understand my name (Patricia)...they took it upon themselves to invent a Chinese name for me for their records --- yes everything was in Chinese. Instantly, I became called Ju Li. (That is probably like the Jane Doe or John Doe in China ... haha!).

While waiting for the doctor, I felt I was about to throw up...and I threw up. Immediately, all events came rushing and my mind felt like it was going fast-forward and was quickly absorbing all memories that I seemed to have lost a while ago. Instantly, I regained everything and was back to the same old "bubbly" Pat. I kept on talking and verifying everything we did to make sure that I didn't lose anything --- I kept on saying: "Oh we're in Shanghai, right?!", "It's because of P2P...", "We had dinner at Xin Jishi...", and "I was in the bathroom, felt dizzy, fainted, and fell." (My wrist supported my whole body and this was the cause of the fracture.)

To cut the long story short, my fractured wrist was X-rayed, plaster-casted, and I was sent home. I had fractured my wrist, lost my consciousness and memory for a while, and I had to go rest. I stayed at the room the whole weekend since I had another check-up on Monday.

Monday came and the 'Specialist' was there...take note, the 'Specialist'cannot speak English. He was talking but I couldn't understand a word he was saying and before I knew it, he has twisted my wrist without warning, whatsoever. (Well, he probably warned me...and I didn't understand.) I had no choice but to cry and shout at the same time...silently cursing the throbbing pain in my wrist. And finally, the worst was over and I had survived...though with tears in my eyes. Again, my wrist was placed in a cast and the next day I flew home.

Home sweet home. I went to two physicians and had my wrist checked. Trusting my instincts, I decided to seek the advice of the doctor who told me that the best solution for my fractured wrist is to have the external fixator*** implanted. This would allow me to move my hands, fingers --- this was good for me as I need my fingers for typing! But then I had to undergo surgery and honestly, this was the first time that I was hospitalized. (Oh sorry...second, the first one was the China hospital pala...) After surgery, I couldn't feel anything but after a while I felt pain that I cannot possibly explain. It was so painful that I couldn't move the rest of my body. For almost a month, I had this device in my left wrist. I seemed to have gotten fond of it. And the doctor was right...I could type, move my fingers, and I even tried to drive two days ago! I don't want to go to surgery again --- but I guess I have to again --- tomorrow. The only way to have this fixator removed is to feel pain again. After tomorrow, I assume things will be back to normal. No more restraints. The only way to regain freedom is to feel pain. I guess that's life for me --- the ultimate balance.

_______________________
*retrograde amnesia - Inability to remember events that occurred before the incidence of trauma or the onset of the disease that caused the amnesia
**Xin Jishi - Shanghainese restaurant serving yummy food like barbequed pork ribs, wine chicken, bun, etc.
***external fixator - device providing rigid immobilization through external skeletal fixation by means of rods attached to pins which are placed in or through the bone.

My left hand:

My X-rayed left hand:

Yu Yuan Adventures

2005-08-17T04:12:00.000+08:00

In 1559, a Ming official named Pan Yunduan launched the construction of this private garden for his father's pleasure. Built in a style that Suzhou gardens often take, Yuyuan garden is characterized by exquisite layout, beautiful scenery and the artistic architecture. Each pavilion, hall, stone and stream in the garden expresses the feeling of a Southern Chinese landscape design from Ming and Qing dynasties.

With VJ, Ann, my fractured wrist, & mom in front of Starbucks...
The "wrong" Nan Xiang Xiao Long...tsk...tsk...
Joseph, Mike, Ann, & Mom with Cathy and VJ bargaining behind them...

Tagged

2005-08-06T14:41:00.000+08:00

Tagged by Paula
Total volume of music files in my computer: konti lang...4GB...
Last CD(s) I bought: Michael Buble, Ray Charles, Bond, Nina Live
Song playing right now: When You Know by Shawn Colvin --- Serendipity OST

Five songs I listen to a lot, or that mean a lot to me:

1. crash into me by dave matthews band --- my mobile phone ringtone... lost for you i'm lost & you come crash into me

2. home by michael buble --- whenever i'm not at home...i listen to this...para ma-homesick... and I know just why you could not come along with me... this was not your dream but you always believed in me...

3. time after time (different versions - everything but the girl, matchbox 20, eva cassidy, cindy lauper, INOJ, tuck & patti) --- i am so in love with this song... if you're lost you can look and you will find me...time after time...

4. cannonball by damien rice --- one of the only 2 songs in my PDA.. it's not hard to grow... when you know that you just don't know...

5. i will run to you by darlene zschech --- my favorite praise song... your eye is on the sparrow...and your hand it comforts me...

Time After Time by Sue Haasler

2005-08-01T16:25:00.000+08:00

Surprisingly --- this book is a nice read.

Excerpts:

1. And let's face it, no man is. They look perfect at the time but if you could see them a couple of years down the time, you'd find they were destined to go wrong one way or the other.

2. But I'd finally realized I'd spent the whole of my life just letting things happen to me and then reacting to them. Good things or bad things, it didn't matter: hardly anything in my life had happened because I made it happen. Not this time. Hard as it was, this was at least my decision.

3. I'd almost managed to convinced myself that I didn't care if I never saw him again. If I didn't care, I wouldn't get hurt. It was such a thin veneer of not-caring that the only way I could maintain it was not to think about him at all. Anytime his name or his face floated into my mind, I shoved them ruthlessly away. I was getting quite good at it --- it was almost like a form of meditation. And now this.

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

2005-08-01T16:05:00.000+08:00

There was a little wave bobbing along in the ocean, having a grand old time. He's enjoying the wind and the fresh air--until he notices the other waves in front of him, crashing against the shore.

"My God, this is terrible," the wave says, "look what's going to happen to me!"

Then along comes another wave. It sees the first wave, looking grim, and it saysto him, "Why do you look so sad?"

The first wave says, "You don't understand! We're all going to crash! All of us waves are going to be nothing! Isn't it terrible?"

The second wave says, "No you don't understand. You're not a wave, you're part of the ocean."

Fortune and Misfortune

2005-07-11T12:16:00.000+08:00

I have to admit, I was a bit skeptic when I found out my ticket had a business class status. I immediately contacted the travel agent because I didn't want to have to expense out this business class ticket knowing that this 3-hour-flight would have to be via economy. After informing me that because the flight was overbooked because of some convention in Shanghai, the travel agent assured me that my ticket became upgraded for free because there are no extra seats in the economy class. (Hay salamat!)

The best things in life are free but sometimes we become suspicious when good things come our way. Maybe it's our human frailty that causes us to be this way. Sometimes we think we are not worthy of the good things because of our own imperfections.We should not think this way.

I believe there is always a balance in life. True enough, when I arrived, the hotel driver was nowhere to be found. I called the hotel and found out that they have mis-booked me thinking that my flight will be tomorrow. I have three choices: 1) wait for 1 hour for the hotel van to arrive; 2) get a taxi; or 3) take the Maglev train. Now this is the misfortune. I don't know how to speak Mandarin and the airport is very far from the hotel. I was really pissed off.

I decided to take my chance and get a taxi. Armed with my basic Mandarin, I was able to tell the driver to take me to the hotel and luckily we understood one another. While on the way, I realized that there is indeed a balance in life. There is this state of equilibrium that we always reach. Fortune or misfortune, whichever comes first, it doesn't really matter. The important thing is that we know how to react in every situation. Misfortune --- take charge. Fortune --- be thankful. These things always happen but we are the ones who always create the end result.

La Maison

2005-07-08T10:31:00.000+08:00

Unholy

2005-07-06T11:45:00.000+08:00

Rivermanyaks ---Mark, VJ, Luis, Philip.

Album cover created by Pawie.

They rock!

Living, Loving, and Learning by Leo Buscaglia

2005-07-01T15:18:00.000+08:00

Most of us look for ourselves out here in the light. You're not going to find it there. You're going to have to get down on your hands and knees inside, where it's sometimes dark and spooky, and discover all those wonderful things about you. You are far more unactualized than you are actualized. And you can go on forever and forever. Knowing that you're limitless is your greatest challenge. Find out all of that wonder of you, and develop it, and stand up proudly and continue to search. And don't be afraid to fail. It's all right. You don't have to be PERFECT. I'm just very happy to be a human person, learning.

Pobody's Nerfect! =)

Sunsets

2005-07-01T15:04:00.000+08:00

O Zahir by Paulo Coelho

2005-06-24T06:29:00.000+08:00

Something or somebody that begins with just a passing thought and ends up being the only one we can think about.

Fireworks

2005-05-27T12:25:00.000+08:00

23 May 2005
Dinner at Paulaner
Beside Huangpu River

Fireworks suddenly appeared over the river while we were having dinner. We thought there was a celebration or something because this boat was cruising along the river while spewing out magnificently colored fireworks.

For others, it may be a normal sight, but for us, it was an unusual sight. I normally see fireworks being displayed during New Year or 'fiestas' and there was definitely no special celebration or event that night.

According to the waiter, "you're lucky if you see the fireworks..". This actually made me think...Am I gonna be lucky because I saw the fireworks? Do they have this superstitious belief that fireworks will bring a person good luck because it scares away the bad spirits? OR does it simply mean that it's one of the random day that they select to display the fireworks?

I am keen to believe and go with the former.You can call me superstitious but I would like to think about good luck being on my side than believing in logical reasoning or practicality.

This adds to the positivity that I seem to bring in my life and hopefully to others.

Home by Michael Buble

2005-05-17T07:15:00.000+08:00

Another summer day has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome but I wanna go home
Maybe surrounded by a million people I still feel all alone
I just wanna go home I miss you, you know
And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two “I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat and you deserve more than that
Another aeroplane another sunny place
I’m lucky I know But I wanna go home,
I’ve got to go homeLet me go home
I’m just too far from where you are I wanna come home
And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside when everything was going right
And I know just why you could not come along with me this was not your dream
But you always believed in me
Another winter day has come and gone away and even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home let me go home
And I’m surrounded by a million people
I still feel alone let go home I miss you, you know
Let me go home I’ve had my run baby, I’m done I gotta go home
Let me go home It will all be right I’ll be home tonight I’m coming back home...

First time to wave at Ping

2005-04-29T09:21:00.000+08:00

I am absolutely intrigued by him.
He is not the average guy....I think.

He loves DVDs.
He wears glasses.
He's nice.
He speaks Mandarin...and English.
He waved at me.
He's taller than me.
He asked me "Do you need A4?".
He has a nice smile.
He has nice hands.
He volunteered to accompany me to buy DVDs.

But I'm leaving tomorrow. The irony of life.

First time to ride the train from Luijiazui station

2005-04-27T14:09:00.000+08:00

crowded. smelly. scary. funny. amusing. cuss words. chinese tea. boxes. glass doors. barely breathing. standing room only. finally --- fresh air.

Turn Left, Turn Right (An Excerpt)

2005-02-28T15:58:00.000+08:00

both are convinced
that a sudden surge of emotion bound them together
beautiful is such a certainty
but uncertainty is more beautiful
because they didn't know each other earlier
they suppose that nothing was happening between them
what of the streets, stairways, and corridors
where they could have
passed each other long ago?
i'd like to ask them whether they remember --
perhaps in a revolving door ever being face to face
an 'excuse me' in a crowd
or a 'wrong number' in the receiver
but i know their answer
no, they don't remember
they'd be greatly astonished
to learn that for a long time
Chance had been playing with them
not yet wholly readyto transform into fate for them
it approached them, then backed off
stood in their wayand, suppressing a giggle, jumped to the side

Life is peachy...

2005-02-28T14:54:00.000+08:00

I have always longed for tenderness, love and a sensitivity of feeling into which I would like to blend. I am a gentle warm person and responsive to "All things bright and beautiful" ... a person who "needs" and indeed "needs to be needed".I am a true extrovert, frivolous and outgoing. I need to feel in control of any situation. If matters are not proceeding according to plan I tend to get extremely irritable and perhaps become difficult to live with.The way things are, if I feel that I am stuck in a rut and there is not much I can do about it, I feel frustrated and inhibited...But if I can find a way to let myself go, I may find that things aren't quite so bad as perhaps I thought they were.It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed I am no exception. It would seem at this time that even though I may be surrounded by people, I am experiencing an inner- loneliness. Fortunately I am sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer me and that I may miss my share of experiences if I fail to make the best use of every opportunity. I therefore pursue my objectives with a fierce intensity and is prepared to commit myself deeply and readily..I believe that whatever I would like to do or think "I can do" - I do! It is fair to say that whatever it is that Ireally want out of life ... I will put my heart and soul into it and will not take "NO" for an answer.