Bittersweet

The conspiring universe is doing its job but I am finding it a bit bittersweet.

I have waited for almost three months for this. And now that I got it, I'm thinking, is this really what I want? In reality, even if I don't absolutely want it, I know I will still push through with it because it's the right thing to do.

Now I'm using my right brain to think.

From The Zahir by Paulo Coelho:
Until one morning, I'll wake up and find I'm thinking about something else, and then I'll know the worst is over. My heart might be bruised, but it will recover and become capable of seeing the beauty of life once more. It's happened before, it will happen again, I'm sure. When someone leaves, it's because someone else is about to arrive --- I'll find love again.